What is a friend? – A quick response to a good friend

Stephen Kneale has written a response to my first article about Jordan Peterson.  You can read it here. I’m relieved that Stephen is not about to unfriend me on social media!  I’m also grateful that he has given me the opportunity to respond and clarify. This is not least because part o f a conversation is about realising when the first response you put out just doesn’t cut it. 

I think the best way to respond is to probably take a little step back to some first principles. In my first post, I talked about choosing your friends carefully. Now, if you read my first post and you’ve met Jordan in real life or on social media and you happen to think he’s a nice guy and you could get along with him then I’m not telling you that you can’t be friends. He may prove to be a fantastic, loyal friend in that sense. Additionally, because I don’t know him and because I’ve not heard anyone who does know him say this explicitly, I don’t know whether or not he is a brother in Christ. I am picking up some hints in the secular media. There may be stuff elsewhere. So again, if Jordan is a professing believer, I’m not saying that you should disfellowship him. Continue reading


The killing of friendship

In his lament for Saul and Jonathan, David says of his friend:

“How I weep for you, my brother Jonathan!  Oh, how much I loved you! And your love for me was deep, deeper than the love of women!”[1]

Some people have picked up on this verse and the other accounts of David and Jonathan to argue that this is an example of and a Biblical argument for homosexuality.

I want to make two points about this. Continue reading

How important exactly am I? -when we demand too much in friendships

And now to Precosia.  In some respects, I find this the saddest of all the scenarios we have looked at.  Why do I say that? It’s not to diminish the seriousness of the other situations. However, I think that generally speaking we are more likely to get what is stake with the other ones.[1] When it comes to friends falling out, we may well underestimate the damage it does to congregations: unity is broken, ministries are disrupted and witness is compromised. Continue reading

What difference does it make? A Rooted Question

In my talk about “Who is God and what has he got to do with me?” (Rooted 1). I said that the response we give to the two questions “Is God great?” and “Is God good?” will affect our lives and relationships with others. Continue reading